Random musings

  “We see life as unfair and ourselves as its victims. We focus on the offenses others have done against us. And we fail to realize all these offenses pale in comparison to our own offenses against God, who not only forgives us, but both requires and enables us to forgive others and move forward free from the past. We should forgive as God forgave us, not once but many times.” This is the heart of God's forgiveness message. I wonder sometimes, what this means for victims. For people who are at the receiving end of others' sins. People dealing with years of trauma, abuse, neglect or betrayal. We all sin and fall short in many different ways, but forgiveness is more complex than that. The offenses that are done against us are wrong, simply because they are like our own offenses — wrong because they are done against God. To imply that our pain is not real or valid because we ourselves have done wrong, would be to negate the entire human race and the wrongs we inflict on each other

Self awareness is the art of understanding ourselves. Why we act the way we do, our thoughts, emotions, likes, dislikes, goals, feelings, who we are, what we want to become, where we want to go, our capabilities, and limitations.   Self awareness has been linked to the ability to make better decisions and informed choices. To create a life we desire and ultimately relate better to the world around us. The desire to learn more about oneself is the basis of personality assessment tools like Myers Brigg.  I identify as an INFJ (Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging) personality type. I remember reading about INFJs and feeling a sense of being understood. I have spent my life feeling like a misfit. I connect with people yet feel disconnected at the same time. I dislike being forced to do things in a highly structured way. My thoughts are abstract;  I silently rebel; I can be opinionated, overtly idealistic, and stubborn but most people wouldn’t know these things about me.   While these

I always start off the New Year with resolutions, most of which don't last for more than a few weeks. I recently heard someone talk about the lessons they learned from the previous year, and it seemed like a great form of introspection. Here are few of my lessons from 2022 -   1. Don't be an insufferable know-it-all. No matter what encyclopedia of knowledge we have or our life experiences or wisdom, there is always something we DO NOT know. Be humble, teachable and open-minded. There are things to learn from every person, young and old. 2. Don't be an expert on someone else's life - We do not know more about someone's life than they do. So, listening is of more value than judging or giving unnecessary opinions. 3. Not everything that people claim is exciting is going to be enjoyable for you. Whether it's bungee jumping or zip lining or rock climbing or what not, just because the pictures look good doesn't mean it was a great experience for everyone involved.

       There is this tree at the intersection of McCaslin and Washington. Every home around it was reduced to rubble from the Marshall fire. Yet, this tree. It is lit up with the Christmas décor placed on it before the fire.           At first, I found it haunting. But now, this tree with the little string of lights on it, is beautiful to me. There is this saying that the smallest of lights shine brightest in the darkness.            During these uncertain times, when we feel depleted and exhausted - maybe we somehow find in us these little lights. It reminds us that there is hope even through dark times - God is with us, with ALL of us, in ALL things.            If we believe that God's hand is only in the good things - what would we tell ourselves if things were to go truly bad? How would we remind ourselves of God's provision or God's love and protection? He is either present in ALL things or He is present in nothing.           This year feels like an extension of the p

Whenever a group of people get together, sooner or later the conversation shifts to other people. Other people's lives, their choices, what they did or said or so on.  This kind of talk is usually harmless. Friendship is built based on this kind of small talk. Things like common interests, mutual likes or dislikes. Cliques are also formed this way. Unfortunately, this kind of talk is not always edifying nor useful.  Sometimes, it is downright harmful. We slander or gossip about people without a second thought on how it potentially ruins a person's reputation by spreading meaningless junk. Slander affects how a person is treated not just by the person who is saying it, but also by all those who hear it. Gossip is responsible for damaging relationships and breaking trust. Yet, this is neither acknowledged nor viewed that way. We all need to process things. This kind of processing sometimes involves saying negative things about other people but this is not the same as gossip becau

Lately, I have been thinking that people have been in our lives for a reason , season or a lifetime . Typically, most folks fall in the first two categories. The " lifetime " people are maybe family and a few people here and there.  When Dev taught Sunday school, many of those kids were a huge part of our lives. Dev was heavily invested in them and cared for them, way more than a typical teacher. Gradually, he drifted away from what he used to do and these kids grew up and became adults and moved on with their lives.  Someone once told us that when you invest in these Sunday School kids, they will grow up and be there for your kids. I think this is mostly untrue. These young adults barely even know that my kids exist, let alone being involved in their lives.  Also, this is an unfair burden and expectation to place on them. Firstly, they are trying to figure out their own lives. They don't really have the headspace or inclination to be involved in someone else's kids&#