Stupidity

We all experience loneliness in varying degrees. Most adults will admit to feeling lonely, sometimes even when surrounded by people, acquaintances or friends. While it is fairly easily to connect through social media, hosting get togethers and parties, it is hard to truly form a genuine connection.

Though I’m not the most social person, I am still in contact with my childhood friends from India. My parents would occasionally interact with my friends’ parents but it never occurred to them to interfere with kids’ friendships. This in in stark contrast with the playdate culture we have in America. Here, the kids friendships' depend on the parents’ dynamics. The kids don't even have the luxury of resolving their own conflicts because parents will most likely micromanage that too. 

This added to the insular culture in America. Friendships, when they happen can seem superficial. I would count myself fortunate even if I have a few friends who genuinely care about my kids. People who take the time and effort to communicate with them and care. 

"The only way to have a friend is to be one."

A seemingly simple concept, which I think our parents generation understands better than us.

My husband probably experiences this void due to lack of meaningful friendships more than I do. Sometimes, he will try to invite people home or text them to keep in touch with them. Usually, the other person puts in zero effort to either sustain the friendship or even maintain contact. 

Maybe, it is part of me being in my glorious 40's - I have increasingly no motivation to keep in touch with such folks, unless I sense at least some effort from their side.

Our generation shouldn't be surprised at our loneliness. We do not have any idea on how to value people or do even the minimum it takes to maintain relationships. We shouldn't be surprised at teenagers or young adults who are self absorbed, because we haven't taught them any different. 

It's almost easier to teach a Sunday school class than it is to be involved in the life of someone else's child. And, I can speak for my kids, when I say that - they tend to like those grown ups and Chechis or Chachans who actually take the time and effort to show them that they care. 

I'm not sure why I feel so negatively about these things these days. It would be so much easier to live for the day and stop having unnecessary expectations. 

To top all this, we have the world's most stupidest election and all the weirdness on a daily basis surrounding that. 

Christians are the most annoyed about how useless bums are going to steal all their hard earned money and how America is going to be so socialist and terrible. 

We intend to solve complex issues of poverty by crumbs of personal charity rather than supporting government policies for reform for the underprivileged. 

We will excuse blatantly wrong behavior by using fancy prayers by fancy preachers in the White House. We will also tote our Bibles and carry our guns because obviously Jesus loves both. 

We will dismiss genuine concerns and hurt caused by racism in black communities by branding ‘Black Lives Matter’ movement as a troublesome organization.

On the other side, we get to decide which pronouns we want for our kids. We can choose from "he, she, it, they” and what not. 

We will use silly slogans like ‘defund police’ and ostracize an entire community of good cops who weren’t willing to take a stand against bad cops in the first place.

We let women terminate pregnancies without any input even from the father. Or, we force women to carry to term those pregnancies which put the woman’s health at risk.

We get to argue about who built the cages and who put the illegal kids in it and why all of this was totally needed and justified because of the law abiding citizens that we are. 

If we think that God approves of any of this nonsense, we must be a special kind of stupid.

Inside every cynical person is a disappointed idealist.